Instructions
The following items are necessary for game play:
  • Either a spot amongst all the other graduates or a ticket for the audience.
  • Robe, cap, and all the other paraphernalia (if a graduation candidate).
  • A lot of beer.
Now check out the main drinking game rules below. What words to watch out for, how slams work, and what to do when in doubt.

Take a drink whenever a speaker uses the words:

  - bright future         - budgeting time        - debt (see also below)

  - deserving             - drinking              - endurance

  - faculty               - finally / at last     - fond memories

  - fraternity            - friendship            - future

  - hard work             - honor                 - interest, -ing

  - job                   - knowledge             - late nights/all-nighters

  - love of learning      - party                 - perseverance

  - preparation           - sacrifice             - sorority

  - study/studies         - support               - tuition

  - vision                - volunteer             - work


Take three drinks when someone quotes:

  • Any other former president of the university
  • Any of our country's Founding Fathers
  • A current rock hit
     

Slam one whenever a speaker:

  • Mentions the "great debt we/you owe our/your parents."
  • Makes a cute remark about the length of time it takes to graduate nowadays (eg., "your six or seven years here"), (slam and a half if that person has been out of college for more than two years)
  • Makes a cute remark about how hard it is to find a job right now (slam and a half if that person gets paid simply to be important).
  • Makes a serious remark about how hard it is to find a job right now.
  • Mentions how many National Merit Scholars there are in this graduating class.
  • Mentions any of the different surveys that rank colleges and universities.
  • Implies that college in general, and your institution in particular, is still affordable.

Slam two whenever a speaker:Implicitly or explicitly implies that the number of National Merit Scholars in this class is a measure of the quality of education this class received at your institution.

Whenever a speaker makes a comment that is completely meaningless and obviously intended only to draw laughs, drink until the laughter dies out.

Whenever a graduate's friends and relatives are tacky enough to cheer/yell/etc. when their name is read, drink until they stop.

Drink until you lose it whenever a speaker quotes the Grateful Dead.

When in doubt, drink.